Befuddled Baker FAIL

Somedays I think I should be riding the short bus.

These last couple of weekends I have had to be at work bright and early at 7 am.  Folks, for someone who normally doesn't report for duty until 1 or 2 pm, 7 am seems awfully early to be my normal chipper self.  Just to make sure that I get to work on time, I have to set my alarm for around 4:20 am.  Yes, you read that right 4:20 AM.  This way I can hit snooze a billion times (and yes, I mean that literally) before actually getting my rear end out of bed at 5:15 am.

Well, the other morning, once I finally mustered the oomph to get up, (which, by the way was 5:30 am NOT 5:15 am : shameful) the first thing I noticed was that my throat was feeling scratchy and sore.  Being grumpy anyway due to the early hour, I was even more annoyed by this unhappy discovery.  I decided that I just didn't have it in me to suffer through the irritating tickling feeling, and that the cough medicine had my name written all over.  Let me clarify: reaching for medicine, unless it's a last resort, is not my usual style.  I would usually wait it out for a few days before taking said cough medicine.  That being the case, I'm really not too familiar with what's in my medicine cabinet.  I reflexively grabbed something that resembled cough medicine, poured out a hefty dose, chugged, and trudged to the shower.

About 20 minutes later, as I was getting dressed, I realized that I was still incredibly tired.  Literally, I couldn't even put makeup on I was so tired.  So I decided to forget about being chipper, and climbed back into bed for another 20 minutes of much needed sleep.  Sadly, the second alarm went off much too soon, and once again I was dragging myself into a standing position.  While driving to work the situation only got worse.  I could barely keep my eyes open.  No exaggerating, I could have easily closed my eyes and fallen immediately asleep, even though I consciously knew I was driving!  Ridiculous!  When I did get to work, things continued to worsen.  I was coherent enough to know that I needed to get coffee into my system - STAT!  However, it didn't seem to do much good.  For the next 2 1/2 hours it was all I could do to keep my head off my desk.  I was even having a little bit of trouble forming rational sentences.  One of my coworkers asked me if I had been out late the night before drinking - how mortifying!  I tried to explain that no, I had gone to bed early, and had no clue why I was so groggy.  He laughed, shook his head, and went back to work, obviously thinking I was fibbing.

Around 11:00 am, after 4 hours of this torture, I began to feel more like my normal self, and the incredible tiredness began to fade thankfully away.  As I began to relate my crazy morning to a friend, she asked about the cough medicine that I had taken.  Could that have possibly been the problem, she wondered?  What an obvious idea.  So obvious that it had not even occurred to my genius self!  I had actually grabbed the bottle when I left my house that morning just in case my throat kept bothering me.  Curious, I fished it out of my lunch bag.  Just my luck : I had taken night time cough medicine.  Yes, yes, I know.  Now you are agreeing with me : I should be riding the short bus.  

Continuing on this shamefully embarrassing streak is my first, and probably only, attempt at brining meat.  I had a lovely meal planned consisting of quinoa, green beans, and brined chicken which sounded fabulous (and smelled fabulous while it was cooking, I might add).  The brine consisted of salt, turbinado sugar, herbs de province, lemon juice, and olive oil.  Sounds delicious, right?  Yeah, I thought so too.  One problem though. Once I sat down and ate my first bite of chicken, my face probably puckered so bad I looked like I was 80!  Salt OVERLOAD.  Eck!  I'm not sure where I messed the process up, but believe me, I seriously screwed this one up folks.  BEFUDDLED BAKER FAIL (reference: failblog.com - go now!).  Sadly, the chicken met my trashcan, and I was stuck with only some quinoa and a pile of lonely green beans.  Jeez....what a week.

Cliche Sayings and Lemons

Sometimes life decides to throw you a curve ball.  Other times, life decides to line up thousands of those scary automatic pitching machines and conduct a curve-ball massacre on you.  Well, let me tell you, I am under siege, and things on the battle field really stink.  Yes, yes, I know.  You take the good with the bad, when you get lemons you make lemonade, and there's always a silver lining, plus all those other cliche sayings. 

Folks, I know everything happens for a reason, you've just got to find it.  I really do.  BUT - that doesn't mean that while it's happening, things aren't rotten! 

As I'm sure you can infer, things in these parts of the woods aren't exactly peachy keen for the moment.  Another fitting cliche:  When it rains, it pours.  Ah....but such is life.  So while I'm trying to find my umbrella, and am dodging those nasty baseballs, I'll just make some lemonade (with vodka please!), and keep my eye out for that silver lining.  Maybe I should get some binoculars....

Make Me Smile Lemon Cookies
Adapted from Allrecipes
Makes 24 cookies

2 tsp lemon juice
2 tsp lemon zest
1/3 C soymilk, unflavored and unsweetened
1/2 C butter, softened
3/4 Turbinado sugar
1 egg
1 3/4 C all purpose flour, unbleached
1 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp baking soda

Directions:
1. Preheat oven to 350 F.  Combine lemon juice with soymilk.  Let sit for 5 minutes.
2. Cream butter and sugar until light and fluffy.  Beat in egg, then add lemon zest and milk mixture.
3. Sift together flour, baking powder, and baking soda.  Combine with creamed mixture thoroughly.  Drop by the rounded spoonful onto ungreased cookie sheet.
4. Bake for 8-10 minutes, until edges are lightly browned.  Remove from oven and cool for 5 minutes on cookie sheet before moving to wire rack.
5. Devour

Coming Out of the Foodaholic Closet

Today I came out of the closet - the foodoholic closet that is.  I'll admit it, food has been my dirty little addiction for quite some time.  I mean, how do you tell people that you read cookbooks for fun?  Or admit that grocery shopping makes you really excited?  I'll tell you what happens when you start talking about these kinds of things....blank stares.  Looks of befuddlement (read: is she serious?!?).  

You see, this blog has been my highly guarded secret.  I have not shared it's existance with a living soul - mainly because off those dreaded dazed looks, but also because I am a commitment coward!  Telling anybody about this little blog would mean that I would have to update it regularly (to avoid being that lame blogger...oh wait...I have been...Ok, moving on...).  I'm not good with "have to's" so I just avoided the whole situation by keeping mum.  Well, those days have officially ended.

It started with good company, good conversation, and a couple (or more) beers.  My lovely friends Sydney, Sam, and Kitty were brainstorming for their own blog.  Despite the alcohol I had inbibed, I managed to keep my mouth closed about my little space in the blog world.  However, as the night progressed, the beer continued to flow, and the brainstorming got more and more creative.  I was thinking that I had anwers to some of their questions, and that a good friend would quit being faint-of-heart and speak up already.  I eventually coaxed myself (admittedly with some help from Modelo) into offering some of my own blogging experience.  It was pretty scary - knowing and facing the commitment that I was about to accept when I opened my mouth to tell Sydney where to find this.  My brain was screaming, "SHUT UP!  JUST SHUT UP!" but alas, I didn't, and here we are today.  Two days later, with some time to think things over and some fresh cookies on my counter, I'm feeling pretty good.  I'm thinking, "Hello commitment - nice to meet you.  Let's keep in touch." 

So back to the freshly baked cookies sitting here, staring me down saying "Eat Me!"... They are good.  Really good.  They have the sweet cutting flavor of the citrus going on, while being wrapped in warm nuttiness from the walnuts and coconut.  Yeah...I know.  They may not be the most beautiful cookies you have ever seen, but they are a perfect munchy choice to go along with a good cup of coffee.  Can you eat cookies for breakfast?  These would be a perfect breakfast cookie...if you are a rebel and break all the food rules.  I mean, they do have rolled oats in them....and that so makes up for any rule-breaking transgressions.  Right?

Orange-Coconut Softies
(I really wanted to say "breakfast cookies" but that just might be too crazy...)
Makes 24 tbsp sized cookies

1 1/2 C rolled oats
3/4 C unbleached all purpose flour
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp salt

1/2 C coconut oil, semi solid
1/2 C turbinado sugar
2 eggs, beaten
1 tsp vanilla
1/2 tsp coconut extract

1/2 C tightly packed shredded coconut, sweetened, toasted
zest of 1 large orange
1/2 chopped walnuts (next time I will pecans)

1.  Preheat oven to 325 F.  Sift flour, baking soda, and salt together.  Mix in oats and set aside.
2.  Cream coconut oil and sugar together.  Add eggs, and both extracts.  Mix well.
3.  Add zest, coconut, and nuts to sugar/oil mixture, and combine thoroughly.
4.  Gradually mix in flour/oats with the sugar/oil.
5.  Drop by the tbsp onto greased cookie sheets.  Bake for 10-12 minutes (mine baked for 11 minutes to be exact)
6.  Devour

And so begins my commited blogging journey....see you next week!